I think I have said this before and I am going to say this again – I feel that I am absolutely lucky and gifted to have been born to a family with 2 inspirational elder sisters and a wonderfully supportive mother and a father who taught me to hold my head up high. This blog entry is inspired by the fact that someone asked me who bought a particular pendant for me (it had something fairly romantic on it) and I answered that it was me. I bought myself that pendant because I think I love myself and this pendant will be a constant reminder to me.
I think that it is so important for all girls to love themselves before loving anyone else. It makes a host of differences to one’s life and I can safely say that I am speaking from experience. I have been in enough relationships, the good and the bad to know that whatever it is, if you don’t love yourself enough, no one is going to treat you the way you deserve to be treated. Each of us, owe it to ourselves to respect our hearts, our souls, our minds and our bodies and to show the rest how we deserve to be treated in order to garner the respect we deserve.
Of late, I have been in a fair amount of vulnerable situations which I know I for a fact I didn’t deserve. The point is, however that I understand that I really do not belong to anyone and no one should be allowed to treat me in a way that I do not like. Yet, I know that its not easy to avoid such situations and even a person such as myself, who constantly reminds myself that I need to love myself in order for others to love me can easily find myself in such a situation. It truly isn’t easy and day after day, I see girls with broken hearts, girls with disillusioned dreams, girls with their aspirations astrew and girls who are told they are not as great as they think and I wish there was a magic mirror which would show them how amazing they actually are.
I am lucky to be the youngest of my family. However, if I did have a younger sister and I could only teach her one thing, it would be how to respect and love herself.
5 ways to love and respect yourself
1. Respect your body and what you put into it.
I think the foremost thing is to always respect your physical self. This goes beyond just loving your body but also in being careful how you treat your body. I think it is important for every girl to spend time looking at herself in the mirror, to embrace every single curve and mark on her body and to understand that this is her and this is what she will be and this is her being most beautiful. I think that it is also important to eat well, dress well and project a good image. By doing so, you have taken the effort in taking care of yourself and you have attracted good vibes from other people who will take care of you the same way; with great effort (Its the law of attraction folks!) When you feel like a million bucks, you will tend to walk and behave differently and will thus ensure that everyone else treats you similarly.
2. Do not let anyone disrespect you or treat you lowly.
This is a simple rule that I believe every girl should make her personal mantra. Everyone needs to make some clear rules as to how they should be treated. If someone hits you or hurts you physically, that is completely unacceptable and no girl should tolerate that. I have seen women get hit and have their ego beaten down, trust me when I say it is the most degrading experience. Never stay in an abusive relationship regardless of whether it is physical or emotional or any other sort of abuse. Never ever let anyone think its okay to speak to you as if you are not as good as them and most importantly, always take a stand as to how you want to be treated. The moment you feel that someone is undermining you, speak up and make sure you are treated the way you truly deserve to be.
3. Invest in yourself.
I always feel that this is something we tend to neglect completely. We are always so intent on satisfying other people’s needs and making time for others that we forget to invest time, effort and money in ourselves. We are always so afraid to spend time alone with ourselves to truly understand our own needs and desires. We feel guilty when we spend on ourselves. I think that at some point in time, it is essential that everyone of us is a little selfish so as to ensure that we make ourselves feel a little better. This means to put ourselves before everyone else and to take care of our needs first. Make no mistake, I am not saying that we need to be completely selfish and ignore the needs of others. I am merely saying that we need to focus on ourselves just as much and in fact a little more than we do others. This in no way means that we must allow ourselves to advance at someone else’s expense. We must care for the needs of others as well but we must think of our own welfare as wel. If we don’t look after ourselves, who will.
4. Focus on your positives.
I think this is fairly related to point number 2. I feel that we always look at our flaws more than at what our perks and strengths are. Why do you consider your chubby cheeks your biggest flaw – look at them from another perspective and they will look so adorable. Why do you think your big butt is your flaw – look at it from another perspective and you’re a lot like J.Lo. Why do you think that scar on your face is your flaw – look at it from another perspective and it adds character to your face, it tells a story and it makes you more memorable and more beautiful. When you focus on what is great about you, those qualities shine and those around you will feel themselves drawn to those qualities more.
5. Respect those around you.
This is simple; do unto others as you would have others do unto you. Treat people with respect and they will understand that you are a secure person who loves yourself and is ready to embrace those around you. Behave with poise and you will find that everyone around you will treat you the same way.