You’re Invited!

Hello all!

As most of you would already know, my birthday falls next Saturday. It’s a very special date cos it’s falling on the 07/07/07 and I am turning 20 this year. It’s really one of those odd times(or rather the only time) you get to celebrate on such a cool day and I’m hoping to have a blast this year!

Some of you might remember my 19th birthday where I pulled an amazing stunt with 19 shots and lots of alcohol. No such thing this year cos I want to be ALIVE for my entire birthday. I cannot believe that I was the only person who didn’t have fun on my birthday. This birthday, I’m not having any kind of party but I will be clubbing at Asoka and i hope you guys can take this as a personal invite to come party with me and my friends! (Tequila is very expensive at Asoka so all the better! 🙂 ).

I do not wish for this birthday to turn out like the 19th so I am really going to be watching my drinks but I really want to have loads of fun so I hope you guys would all come like last year and show me some love! (I am not accepting any drinks as part of the celebration). Some of you might hate Asoka cos it might seem like a typical maama club but trust me, the place is way classier than N9 and Raaga and all that plus there’s a good mix of both English and Tamil music.

I’ve lost my handphone 2 times this year and changed my number so I may not be able to message everyone personally so please kindly take note of the date and pass the message to the rest too!

Seeya guys there! And don’t forget my presents!(so shameless ah!)  070707!!

Happy Fathers’ Day

I’ve always felt that a father’s duty and obligation to a family is much more complex than a mother’s. Don’t get me wrong because I certainly do appreciate how tirelessly my mother has worked to ensure my family stays together and more importantly that we all grew up with the right principles. But a father doesn’t get that sort of recognition easily. Furthermore, I’ve come to understand that men and women are different in the way they express themselves and as such, a father often has this barrier to fight against when it comes to his children. Yet, most of us fathers deserve a salute for the way they have still managed to teach us life’s most important lessons, shelter us from the harsh realities of life and lastly be our heroes.

As most faithful readers of my blog would know, I hold my father very dearly to me. I lost my father before I could fully appreciate everything he has done for me and that is exactly why I urge everyone to love and cherish the ones we hold close to our hearts today. Waiting for tomorrow is of no use when we have today to do and say what we feel.

Today when I think of my father and silently wish him a Happy Fathers’ Day, i think of the smart,poised and confident man whose image appears before me. I may not be as eloquent as him, but I certainly got my affinity for languages and literature from his passion for reading. I remember being his trophy daughter who could read his law books at the grand age of 6 and how he’d make me read these books and pronounce the tough words in front of all his friends. That’s the kind of person my Dad was. He was never worried that he had 3 daughters instead of sons. Instead, he brought us up with so much pride that all of us have become so proud of being woman and know we can stand up against anything.

He was never one to stinge and i still have all the luxurious party frocks and dresses he bought me from London where he studied Law. We were his 3 dolls and princesses and we deserved only the best. No matter what he could or could not afford, he always made sure we were never in want of something. I spent a lot of my time with my father because I was the youngest and I often had the earliest timings to end school and he’d be home in the afternoons at that time. I remember how we’d both watch telly lying on either side of the sofa and how he’d give me money to go buy potato chips and would cook for me even(he made really good baked potatoes man!).

I remember every Sports Meeting and House Practice I had to attend when i was in Primary School on Saturdays and how he’d tirelessly drive me to and fro. I used to always annoy him as I’d be afraid that I was late for practice and he’d still tolerate all that. I remember one of my birthdays that fell on a Saturday and how we went to buy cake after my practice. I miss him terribly whenever I think of all these moments.

I remember how he pampered all of us and all my cousins as well. Even some of his tuition kids like Pinky and Angel will definitely remember him for the good man he was.

Most importantly, I learnt never to bow down to anyone, never to give up easily, never to be unsure of what I want and to always make sure I was respectful and mindful. If it wasn’t for my father, I would not be who I am today.

It’s incredibly painful to have no one to force awake(used to force his eyes open) on Fathers’ Day or have anyone bug you to make coffee for them. Daddy, if you came back now, we’d make you ALL the coffee in the world without any usual complains.

I love you Daddy and thank you for teaching me lessons even in your passing. To cherish and to love and to never let a day pass with regrets. To the rest of you, I hope you have a beautiful fathers’ day and take this moment to put aside any bitterness amidst your relationship with your Dad and actually thank him for all that he has done for you.

There’s something like a line of gold thread running through a man’s words when he talks to his daughter, and gradually over the years it gets to be long enough for you to pick up in your hands and weave into a cloth that feels like love itself. ~John Gregory Brown, Decorations in a Ruined Cemetery, 1994

To all my uncles who have treated me like their own daughter, my tamil teacher who lovingly calls me his daughter, my beautiful male friends who would be fathers in time to come and my many friends who already have illegitimate children running around(hehe).. Happy Fathers’ Day.

The things in the world I simply do not understand..

It’s one of those posts again. The ones where I am extremely perturbed about things and issues that I have to share with my faithful blog readers.

Firstly, I’ve never understood some silly shoutouts/nicknames and even “mottos” people have in life. Before I begin, I should definitely make it clear that I am in no way referring to anyone through my blog entry and yes I understand the repercussions of my “very resounding” words and I shall try my level best never to hurt or tarnish anyone’s names. (yea right.)

1.You hate me because you wanna be me!

See, I for one appreciate the immense confidence certain people have but I really don’t think I’d hate you if I wanted to be you. Envy perhaps, admiration understandable, jealousy even. But hatred? Nah. I agree that sometimes people say bad things about you because they cannot do the same things that you can do so openly. But that does not equate to them wanting to be you really. They hate you cos they don’t have your guts but do they really want to be you? NOPE. And I think anyone who uses this already overly-used excuse should be shot for two reasons. 1: It’s overly used. 2. It simply means you have no other way of defending yourself or for that matter justifying the issue that you have to resort to narcissistic beliefs that everyone wants to be your twin.

2.I should thank your exes for being out of your life so I can be with you.

Baleh Baleh! What great reasoning you must have! Indeed, one man’s meat, another man’s poison. But to the extent of thanking them? I’m still waiting for the flowers and the thank-you card for having left the lives of my ex boyfriends so that they can have a great time with you ladies.(And mind you, pretty much all my ex boyfriends seem to strike gold after me!) What other silly things can we thank people for? Hmmm let me see. I thank you for shooting me in the head because I met my fiancee who was my nurse in the hospital? I thank you for leaving my squirrels out in the blistering sun because now my mother bought me a cat?  Remind me again during thanksgiving to add those into my prayers.

3.Heaven doesn’t want me. Hell is afraid of me.

Yes they certainly must be *cough*L*cough*O*cough*S*cough*E*cough*R.  I’m not going to even elaborate on this category of smart alec wannabes who fall short of this much <————————————————————————————————————————-> wit.(arrow signifies dearth) to actually making it.

And then all of you can turn to me and go what gives you the right to poke fun of people’s Friendsters and Msn nicknames when you claim to be all up for freedom of speech and letting people do what they want. To you i say, yes please go ahead and do what you want. (but don’t mind me laughing at your expense).

Another thing that has perturbed me of late is the fact that policemen really do seem to have a lot of time to screen. I must remind you people of the time i got raided for eating ice cream below my block but this one seems even sillier. Fair enough, I was not there at this point in time but a friend was telling me about this very ridiculous thing that happened at an indian nightclub. Apparently there was a raid (fair enough) but the way people handled the situation left me at a point of not knowing whether I should smack my head or laugh. My friends were apparently chided for keeping their hands on their hips/laughing because they are 27 and haven’t been raided for 7 years and this kept them outside the club for a good 40 minutes getting threatened by police officers to the point of arrest and even having a letter filed to their respective units about their behaviour(yes, for putting your hands on your hips).

The funniest thing was that they were not even warned that they were not to put their hands on their hips and were told merely not to keep them in their pockets. Oh and this whole bunch of them are decent, clean-cut people who never cause trouble to anyone. I wonder how many actual gangsters these officers must have accidentally let go off because they choose to nitpick on very very very very errant behaviour such as putting your hands on your hips (apparently it was really made into a big deal).

I have lots of respect for the force. Enough to have wanted to be part of it for a very long time. But I’m simply wondering if our civil servants in Singapore actually have an understanding of situations and how to deal with them without constantly referring to their books of theory. It’s going to be hilarious if everytime a mother so much so as tries to explain to her child about impending bomb threats (read story below), she gets barred from taking a plane. Yes, the threats are so real I understand. But to a point of paranoia and complete disregard for what seems like a very understandable situation? I think not.

Screenings are fine. In fact, they are very necessary. But sometimes perhaps you gotta think about situations and what is happening. More importantly, I think people should learn to speak with the right tone especially when you are dealing with someone who is not guilty of anything and who does not owe it to you, to show you their Identity Cards. If I remember correctly, an ex-policeman once told me that as long as you did not commit a crime, were not part of a crime scene, you have the right to ask an officer why he/she is raiding you. Interesting but i think I’d save myself the trouble and simply hand over the identity card and whine about it later. Oh well..

This was grabbed off an email I saw on a blog: http://www.ifsandmaybes.blogspot.com (don’t know the guy but I think I got to give him credit cos he posted this email first! So Cheers whoever you are!) This is another story of how sometimes quick and cautious thinking is not so ideal. Do read the whole thing, it’s quite interesting. Hit Me back with your comments! Cheerios! 

Subject
A FAMILY HOLIDAY RUINED BY ILLOGICAL SECURITY OFFICERS

Dear everyone

Thank you so much for your concern for asking why I did not make it for my trip to Australia. I have told some of you, and not had the chance to explain to all of you. In short, something completely out of my imagination happened and I could not board my flight.

Following is an email complaint that I have filed with CAAS, cced to whoever that is important.

It’s 4 pages long – for your leisure reading and entertainment.

=) Sandra

—–Original Message—–
From: John Lee [mailto:john.lee.mc@gmail.com]
Sent: Monday, 12 March 2007 14:28
To: foo_sek_min@caas.gov.sg
Cc: lee_hsien_loong@pmo.gov.sg; wan_kan_seng@mha.gov.sg;
raymond_lim@mot.gov.sg; lee_swee_say@pmo.gov.sg;
angela_lam@caas.gov.sg;
tan_lye_teck@caas.gov.sg; tay_tiang_guan@caas.gov.sg;
loh_ngai_seng@mha.gov.sg; choong_may_ling@mha.gov.sg;
chua_chong_kheng@mot.gov.sg; soh_poh_theen@mot.gov.sg;
peter_ho@mfa.gov.sg; lee_ark_boon@nscs.gov.sg

Subject: A FAMILY HOLIDAY RUINED BY ILLOGICAL SECURITY OFFICERS

Dear Mr. Foo,

My name is Sandra Tan (I/C number 7*******G). It is with great disappointment and distress that I am filing a complaint to you with regards to my situation.

My family (including myself, my husband, my daughter, and my son)planned a Darwin holiday for the March school vacation period and was supposed to depart on 09 March. Unfortunately, we were put in a situation by the security officers at the departure terminal, that was way beyond our control and we were not able to make our trip.
The following is an account of what had happened : –

I entered the Immigration gantry at about 7.15pm with my daughter (Belle Lee, 13 yrs old) to have our passport scanned and our hand carryluggage checked whilst my husband (Lee Ming Chong) stayed behind with my son (Caius Lee, 8 yrs old) at the ticketing counter to sort out my son’s visa. After having mine and my Belle’s passport scanned, we proceed to the security gantry to have our hand luggage and our bodies scanned. Belle passed the security gantry first, whilst I followed right behind her. A lady officer asked me to remove my boots for scanning, and I did as told immediately and put my boots inside the basket provided, for it to be scanned together with my hand luggage. I then proceed to the metal detector of which I cleared without the gantry beeping or detecting any metal objects. I was then asked to collect my luggage and my boots. In the mean time, Belle was throwing away a sweet wrapper and retuning to me and saw me putting on my boots. Belle then asked casually “Mummy, why do you have to remove your shoes?” Whilst putting on my boots, I replied her and said that “they (the security officers) are afraid that we might keep bombs in our shoes (which is why I need to take it off to have it scanned)”

Immediately, a security officer standing at the conveyor belt (Stephen S Naidira) who was standing in front of me said with a very rude tone “repeat what you just said”. I clarified with him what he meant – is it for me to repeat what I had told my daughter? He said loudly again, to repeat what I had just said. So I did exactly what he told me. I said to him that “my daughter asked me why I need to take off my shoes, and I told her that you guys (the security officers) are afraid that we will keep bombs in our shoes.” He immediately asked me to stand aside
and said that he had to report it to his superior that I said the word “bomb” twice. Then an Indian lady (Sivamalar) at the customs started hurling at me and my daughter and said that I said the word “bomb” twice and it is against the law and I can be sent to jail and they are calling the police. She (Sivamalar) was so loud and rude and she shoved us to the side, and refused to listen to my explanation. In fact, she got so aggressive that another officer Ricky Lim (I guess it’s her supervisor) had to come forward to stop her from further attacking me and my daughter verbally, and specifically asked Sivamalar to “shut up”. I told Ricky Lim that I would like to know the names of his staff because their attitude and rudeness were simply beyond any acceptable level. Immediately
Sivamalar got so angry and aggressive that shestarted charging at Ricky Lim and hurled “What?! What?! What?! She (she meant me) said the word “Bomb” twice, so what is wrong with arresting her (which is me) and we were told that if we heard the word twice, we will arrest!!” At that time, Stephen S Naidira came to me again to intimidate me
further by asking me to repeat what I said earlier to my daughter again… I refused to repeat again then because I believe he was deliberately asking me to repeat so that he can count the number of times that I mentioned the word “bomb”. I also believe that that the officers were deliberately provoking me by being rude and intimidating, in the hope that I will retaliate in kind, thereby making their unreasonable actions justifiable.

Despite my anger and the fact that my daughter was scared to tears by the situation, I knew I had to keep my cool. I sat aside with my daughter taking down names of the personnel involved on my mobile phone. I was told to wait for another officer of a higher rank to decide on the matter, and I was still hoping whoever the higher ranked officer that was coming will have the logical thinking to acknowledge that what I had said to my daughter was a simple, harmless private conversation taken completely out-of-context.

At about 7.30pm, the Sergeant-in-charge, Amran Buang came. After I explained the full context of the incident to him, he refused to make a decision and decided to escalate it further to the Auxilary Police and State Police. He said that the word “bomb” is very sensitive and I should not have mentioned it twice. I explained to him that I did not know saying the word “bomb” is against the law, and I further explained that I did not say the word “bomb” in a threatening context to the officer, the word “bomb” was taken completely out of context as part of an answer to my daughter’s question. Despite my explanation, he said he cannot make the decision and my case has to be escalated to higher authorities.

Meanwhile, at about 7.40pm, my son’s visa cleared and my husband and my son came in through the customs. After knowing what had happened, my husband tried to talk to Sergeant Amran Buang, further explaining to him that we are just a family going on holiday and what I have said to my daughter had been taken out of context. Again, no one
was bothered to listen. And again, we were told to wait for another officer with an even higher ranking. With time ticking away and at 7.55pm with no sign of the higher authorities appearing, we knew then our hope of boarding
our flight had diminished.

Whilst waiting, Stephen S Naidira (the security officer) gathered with a few security officers at the side, including Sivamalar to discuss how they should present their statement to the police when they arrive later to make sure that they are adequately covered, and that they are just following the rule and doing what they were told
to do. They said by insisting that they are taking actions “by-the-book”, they would be ok.

I hope by now you have a clear picture of the situation. My kids were both crying then, with more and more policemen arriving which scared the living daylights of them, and with no hope to continue our holiday plans. I believe every action inside the terminal is recorded and I would insist that your review the CCTV recordings on
that night to know that I am only stating the truth without exaggeration. You can also see that during the entire episode, I was not at any point defiant or rude or refused any further check by the officers, despite
the infuriating situation that me and my family were put through.

I know it is important to stay vigilant to protect Singapore. I have young children, I know how important it is, which is why I complied without complaining when I had to remove my boots for scanning. However, here is an obvious case of the security officers trying to get away with their rudeness and aggressiveness by taking things way beyond what was necessary, in the name of following the security protocol. They were really angry when I asked for their
names from Mr. Ricky Lim, and they knew very well then that they can abuse their power to make things very difficult for me and my family.

At around 8.05pm, we were informed by the Tiger Airways personnel that the plane will have to depart and they will off-load our luggage from the plane. At around 8.10 p.m., the State Police and other policemen arrived to take our statement.

In the entire episode, the State Police and the SWISS PORT personnel were the only ones who conducted themselves professionally and offered us consolation and meaningful advice. They have also at some stages expressed their personal views that they acknowledged this incident was gravely mis-handled on the part of the security officers. The State Police further confirmed that there is no case against us, and they would just need to complete the paperwork.

The Budget Terminal manager came to meet me and said that whilst he empathized with our situation, it is an airport security protocol and frankly, it’s “just too bad” that this happened to us.

My statement and my daughter’s statement only completed at about 10.45p.m. The counter service staff, Ms Nur Aisah Bte Ali Hassan was very helpful and advised us on our next steps. She was kind enough to ask us to return the next day to change the traveling dates and advised the additional charges involved.

I am not given a report for this case, but my case number with the State Police is P/20070309/0015. I was already told by the State Police that the case is closed without further action.

For the ordeal that my family had been put through, I would want an official reply from CAAS and all relevant authorities addressing the following : –

Whether the security officers were trained to handle passengers with such bad attitude and rudeness and if such actions by them are condoned by authorities. I would insist you to refer to the CCTV recordings during the period of the incident.

What actions would be taken by CAAS and all relevant authorities with reference to both the security officers, Mr. Stephen S Naidira and Ms. Sivamalar, for their unruly behavior and attitude? Surely, characters as such do not belong to a national airport that aspired to be a world class traveling hub.

What actions would be taken by CAAS and all relevant authorities with reference to Sergeant Amran Buang, who had the authority to end this episode promptly, but instead decided to prolong our ordeal for no justifiable cause? Is it a protocol that even after establishing the facts that we, as a family poses no security threat, there is still
a need to escalate the matter to the authority and have the State Police and other policemen carry out a full investigations only to end up in vain? Why is it that even at level of Sergeant, whom I reckon is better educated, experienced, and able to make logical sense of the whole situation, refuse to make a simple decision and end our ordeal quickly? Is this a Singapore civil service practice where decision making is pushed and shoved from one level to another no matter how obvious what the final decision should be from the very beginning?

Whether all the officers concern are properly trained and competent to handle such situation. Besides hardware (i.e. the protocol book), are they taught to apply the software (i.e. common senses)? Is it really a protocol that as long as the word “bomb” is mentioned twice by a person (once being asked to repeat by the officer) – then no matter what context, tone, situation and profile of the person who said it, it would not be taken into consideration?

What if my daughter instead of asking me a simple question about my shoes, decided to say: “mummy, according to news report, there are speculations that the recent Indonesian air crash may be attributed to a bomb inside the plane.” Would your security officer would come up to her and ask her to repeat one more time, and she would be put under arrest? Your staff kept telling me that saying the word “bomb” in the airport is illegal and I can go to jail. They quoted newspaper examples of how people have gone to jail because of that. I think your staffs need to be trained to understand and differentiate situations and circumstances. As far as I knew, the people that went to jail had VERBALLY THREATENED staff members in the aviation service or had DELIBERATELY caused public alarm using
sensitive words.

My case was clearly none of the above. Even if, I am saying if, indeed its illegal to mention the word “bomb” in the airport no matter what context, the person involved need to be warned ahead of time. You cannot arrest a person for committing something illegal when the person has no idea that the word is illegal in the first place. Your staff could have given me a verbal warning to say that such sensitive words should be refrained in the airport and I would have walk away remembering the warning. But instead, they decide to let the matter escalate further.

Who is to compensate for the expenses that are already incurred and forfeited for this trip, and our emotional stress and duress during the entire episode? The total cost incurred, including air tickets, accommodation, and land tours amount to about $4,200. We had to put up with hours of humiliation with more than twenty policemen and
officials surrounding us, questioning us, checking our luggage through and through.

We had put up with never-ending questioning from different departments, and best of all, repeated checks on my same pair of boots. My kids were terrified, puzzled, disappointed and exhausted from this entire ordeal. My husband and I are left with one week of applied leave and no vacation and holiday to look forward to.

I would like to state that not everyone that we came across in this episode had been unpleasant. I wish to take this opportunity to express my gratitude for the empathy shown by the State Police and the SWISS PORT personnel.

I will be waiting for your reply. Please let me know when to expect it in email. In the mean time, I may seek legal advice for my rights and entitlement in this incident.

Yours sincerely

Sandra Tan Hong Lian
I/C : S______G
Blk *** , T******s Ave *
#0*-***, Singapore 5*****
Mobile : 8******0

———————————————————————————————————-

Happiness

I ripped this off an entry i wrote in my previous blog cos it suddenly struck me that it may not be true.

This was sent to me on an email by a friend of mine.

What do you expect from such simple creatures? Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can be President. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth. The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky. You don’t have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100. People never stare at your chest when you’re talking to them. The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected. New shoes don’t cut, blister, or mangle your feet. One mood all the time.

Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about tanks. A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.

Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough. You almost never have strap problems in public. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. Everything on your face stays its original color. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face and neck.

You can play with toys all your life. Your belly usually hides your big hips. One wallet and one pair of shoes — one color for all seasons. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. You can “do” your nails with a pocket knife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.

You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.

And then i was thinking that this may not actually be true.

Because we women have perks too.

We can blame the extra pudge on the tummy on bloating(not the beers). The days we feel like being total bitches, we could actually blame on PMS(when it could have simply been a moody outburst. I PMS 7 times a month :P).  We don’t ever need to pay for sex. We do not need to worry about turning hard staring at a hot person in front of us in the train (cos it’s never going to show!).  Everytime you need an ego boost you just got to turn to the nearest guy around you (you’d always be more intellectual than them. It’s nature’s law and that in it’s own should make you feel oh so great!)

Watching people frolic naked on television does not affect us in any way. We do not get drunk and fight in brawls (at least most of us don’t). We can actually be in a relationship even after hearing someone say “I love you” (read: Commitment-Phobia!).  Balls thrown in wrong angles during games will not affect us as drastically. Zippers on pants can get stuck without causing any pain or damage. We can actually find clothes in colours such as pale pink , peacock green, emerald green, turquoise, bold red, dark fuchsia, violet and even indigo and guess what? We actually can see the difference. Thank you God for giving us at least twice as more shopping havens than the boys.

We can enter a club and have free drinks all night long and still get drinks from men. We don’t see the need to hold back our emotions when we see them coming. In fact, we’re more than willing to let them out. And you call us the emotionally confused ones? At least we don’t hold back.  We can kiss each other and still look hot. 😉

Beat that!

Ladies feel free to add your lists of why it’s so good to be a woman in the comments! Being a man might be easier but being a woman is so so so so MUCH funner!

Announcement!!

To the whole wide world!!!

 MY BIRTHDAY IS COMING!

in a month.

 

07/07/07!!!  

When imagination consumes you..

A conversation between me and a male friend:

(After coming across a vending machine for umbrellas in my school)

Friend: Why would they sell umbrellas in a vending machine? You know what would be a great vending machine? A machine that sells girls!

Me: (fake laughter). And you know why they’d never have a vending machine for men? Cos nobody would buy them!

Friend: (stares)

Me: Actually you know what? They should have a vending machine but you got to be able to choose which kind you want, i.e: Without horniness, without asshole tendencies, without laziness etc etc.

Friend: (stares harder)

Me: OH BUT WAIT! THEN WE WON’T HAVE ANY MEN TO PUT INTO THE MACHINE!

🙂

Now what would you want in your vending machine? Hit me back with the comments.